When The Women Are Away, The Men Will Talk
by ShadowBeats22107
Summary: awhisperthroughthewinds' request: full summary inside ;) Read to find out how Tony gets insulted in a way that is just not what you'd expect :)


**Fanfic:****When The Women Are Away, The Men Will Talk, Avengers.  
****Author:****ShadowBeats22107.  
****Disclaimer:****I don't own Avengers. Or anything that inspires me to write fanfics. And apologies for any OCCs you may find in this.  
****Word Count: ****1,500.****  
Summary: **_**awhisperthroughthewinds**_**' request: a companion piece to '**_**When The Men Are Away, The Women Will Talk**_**'. Rated T for the humorous situations included in this story... Happens during the same time as '**_**When The Men Are Away, The Women Will Talk**_**'. My '**_**In This Together**_**/ **_**One Step at a Time**_**' series.**

_**28**__**th**__** April 2015...  
Tony's Private Room at the Barclays Center,  
Boston Celtics vs. Brooklyn Nets**_

"So... Barton... When was the first time you and Spidey kissed?" Tony asked suddenly, making the archer look away from the watch to stare at the Genius with a raised eyebrow.

"What?" Clint asked, surprise clearly written over his face and in his voice.

"Well, we know that you two started your relationship but we don't know how your relationship began to start..." the Genius replied with a shrug as he kept his eyes on the game.

Clint bit his bottom lip as he thought about the Billionaire's statement. "It was three months after Sao Paulo... A month after that, it was two, three days after I found out that Barney was supposedly killed, we made out in my apartment but we didn't go any further than caresses... Natasha had actually used it to make sure that I didn't drink myself unconscious like I had the day I found out," the archer confessed, making the three men look at him with shocked faces.

"So even when you guys weren't in a relationship, you were looking out for each other..." Steve stated, watching the archer as he nodded with a soft smile.

"Partners always look out for each other Steve..." Clint replied, making everyone chuckle at the other meaning to the archer's statement.

"So... wait... I thought you guys started yer relationship on a mission in Dublin," Tony stated, a confused look written over his face (_never thought I'd say that about Tony_).

"We did... Me and Nat were fighting about something that happened on the mission... I ended up almost confessing my feelings for her... Then we argued about that... And then we ended up sleeping together and we started our relationship then," Clint replied, chuckling at the memory.

"So ye two were straight to the point... In all honesty, I thought it would've been Pepper and Tony that would be the ones to be that straight forward but you and Natasha proved us wrong yet again..." Bruce stated, making Clint blush slightly at his statement.

"We weren't that straightforward Bruce," Clint defended, trying hard to control his blush. _Where was his assassin training when he needed it?_

"Really...? You and Natasha started yer relationship _after_ you two slept together..." Steve stated, making Clint glare at him half heartedly.

"Steve, do I have to remind you of what Jane and Nat did to you and Darcy...? The fact that they locked you two into a bedroom... _Alone_..."? Clint replied, smirking when Steve blushed in reply.

"Shut up Clint," Steve mumbled, ducking his head as he blushed deeply.

"That reminds me... Barton, how do you and Mrs Legolas get more action than the combination of the rest of the Tower?" Tony asked, smirking knowingly at the archer as he paused and blushed.

"Do I have to answer that?" Clint replied, looking at the other men who only nodded, eyeing the archer as he looked at them with a shocked face.

"I don't know... We just do... I guess that's the result of being separated for a full year with only Skype to keep contact..." Clint confessed, frowning in thought as he recalled all of the video chats he and his wife had had when he was in New Mexico while she was in Russia. "Can I ask why you lot are interrogating me like I've done something wrong?" he asked, looking up and glaring at his companions.

"Do you know that you and Natasha keep the rest of the Tower awake with your '_activities_'?" Bruce replied with a knowing smirk, making Clint's jaw drop in surprise.

"We... We're not... that loud...?" Clint stated (_more like asked_), looking at each of his teammates who all raised an amused eyebrow at him in response. "I-... I'm not going to bother giving Tony's statement a retort," he eventually stated, pouting childishly as everyone chuckled at him.

"Barton, you opened yourself up for that teasing," Nick stated, smirking at the archer as said man turned to glare at the one eyed Director.

"Sir, may I need to remind you that both myself and Natasha were able to tell that you and Maria had been sleeping together within the first month of yer relationship..." Clint stated, raising an amused eyebrow at the dark skinned man.

Nick opened his mouth to respond but was unable to think of anything, quickly shutting up and turning his attention back to the game.

"What I really want to know is how Clint knows exactly what to do to shut people up and how he knows all the advice about women he knows..." Steve stated, earning nods of agreement from the other men.

Clint raised an eyebrow at the group, smirking at them knowingly. "Nat and I will be in a relationship at the end of November for eighteen years... We will be married for ten years on the 1st of May... I think that answers how I know so much advice about woman... As for knowing what to say to shut people up... Have any of you seen how Natasha threatens people in her interrogations?" he asked, smirking when realisation dawned on the group of men.

"Do you like putting the rest of us to shame Lord Clint...? None of us seem to be able to make our own ladies scream in pure pleasure as we dance with them in the privacy of our sleeping chambers?" Thor asked, making most of the men pause and blush at the God's blunt statement.

"Speak for yourself Thor... I, personally, think that I am very capable of making Pepper scream in pleasure," Tony retorted defensively, making everyone chuckle at him.

"But Man of Iron, you do not make Lady Pepper scream in delight the same way that Lord Clint makes Lady Natasha scream..." Thor stated, confusion clearly written over his face.

All of the other men (_except Tony_) started laughing at the Genius who was glaring at the Thunder God. "That was totally uncalled for Thor... Way to knock a man's ego..." the Genius pouted, folding his arms and slouching in his chair. The Billionaire continued to mumble under his breath about '_stupid little cupids with their toy arrows and bows_' and '_troublesome Thunder Gods that don't know when to shut up_'.

Clint chuckled before suddenly standing up, making everyone (_except Tony who was still pouting liked a bold child that had just been caught stealing cookies from the cookie jar_) look at him with confused faces. "What...? I wanna know Natasha's getting on with the kids," he stated as he took out his phone and dialled his wife's number, walking over to the door so he could speak to the ex-Russian privately in her native tongue. The archer couldn't wait until he got home so he could show his wife just how much he loved her.

_*** * * A Few Hours Later * * *  
When The Guys Return To The Tower After The Game...**_

"So what shall you brave warriors do when you see your respective fair ladies when you return home?" Thor asked bluntly, making everyone chuckle as they entered the Tower. Clint smirked as he made his way over to the elevator, making everyone raise an eyebrow at him.

"I'm going home to show my wife how much I love her," Clint stated as he entered the elevator, smirking as he noticed the raised eyebrows on his friends' faces. "I can't promised that we won't keep you guys up all night... But hey, what can I say... This Avenger, right here, has more talent at pleasing his wife than the rest of ye combined," he added with a mischievously smug smirk, his smug look growing when the men started throwing rude insults at him.

The elevator quickly arrived at his and Natasha's apartment, making Clint smirk as he looked at his watch, seeing that he would definitely be able to show his wife his love for her as their three children were surely asleep by now. And the archer made a mental note to spend the whole next day alone with his own family.

"_Welcome home my Hawk," Natasha whispered as her husband exited the elevator and walked over to her._

"_Hey Gorgeous," Clint whispered as Natasha stood up and pressed her lips against his softly, slowly wrapping her arms around his neck. "Miss me?" he teased as Natasha sucked on his bottom lip teasingly, nipping on it slightly at the same time._

"_Yes..." Natasha whispered as she slowly pulled away and grabbed Clint's belt. "Now you get to show me just how much you missed me... Master," the red head stated with a cheeky grin as she dragged her husband to their bedroom._

"_Of course I will, Mrs Barton," Clint replied with a grin, easily following his wife to their bedroom, planning on making the red head scream in pleasure all night._

**This was so fun to write... Hehe... Was that any good? Please let me know what you guys thought :)**


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